


I'm Sorry

by Evilbunnygirl93



Category: the GazettE
Genre: Angst, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-05
Updated: 2016-11-05
Packaged: 2018-08-29 07:17:23
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,890
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8480581
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Evilbunnygirl93/pseuds/Evilbunnygirl93
Summary: Aoi blames Reita for feeling the way he does and so he takes his anger out on him. What will he do when Reita ends up in the hospital





	

            It had been a long live and it took a bigger toll on the band member’s bodies than usual. It was their second to last concert of the tour and it was the third day in a row of them playing. One by one, the members stumbled off stage and fell to the cold floor as their bodies shook from the rushing adrenaline. Kai once again looked like he was about to die with his ghostly white face that was dripping sweat. Two roadies were carrying him further to the back as the members started picking themselves up to get into the dressing room. Ruki made himself comfortable on the first couch while Reita collapsed onto the other one. Kai was in the corner of the room getting fanned and wiped down with wet rags. The two guitarists found comfy spots on the floor. They were all ready to just sleep in the venue that night. However, they couldn’t rest for too much longer before their manager sent them off to their hotel.

            In the van, Aoi and Kai got the window seats in the back with the bassist sitting between them. Uruha laid down in the seat in front of them and Ruki took the front passenger seat. The raven kept his eyes out the window most of the drive until he felt someone’s weight leaning on him. He turned his head see a ball of blonde hair laying on his shoulder. A light snore came from his band mate and he smiled softly as he swiped some hair from Reita’s face. The younger had a light blush on his cheeks as he continued his light slumber. No doubt his body had been over worked like the rest of theirs had. Aoi himself was feeling a bit feverish that night.

            They soon arrived to the hotel where they were given their room keys, Ruki and Uruha were sharing a room, Aoi and Kai were sharing a room while Reita had one for himself this time. The members were like zombies as they walked to the elevator. As they went through the door, Uruha blinked for what he thought was a second, but ended up falling against Kai and, like a domino effect, he fell onto the others making them all fall into the opening elevator. They groaned as they crawled off each other and just stay seated on the floor. Reita, who had been at the bottom of the pile, just decided to lay there as the doors closed and the button to their floor was pushed. He sighed as he slid a bit to the nearby legs and laid his head on them. He didn’t pay any attention to whom they belong to as long as they were comfortable.

            The ding of the elevator woke them from their quick nap and they stood up, leaning on each other as they went to their own rooms. Aoi slipped into his and Kai’s room and made a straight shot to the bed as his roommate made a beeline to the bathroom. The raven scratched his head as he opened his bag to pull out some night clothes and inside he also found the manga that the bassist lent him earlier that day. He sighed knowing he needed to return it or he would get hell the next morning. He grabbed his room key and the extra key to Reita’s room. He figured the bassist would be too tired to get out of bed, so he knew he would have to get in somehow.

            He walked out and down the hallway to the next room over. He gave a knock before he slid the key into the door and opened it up. Just like he suspected, the blonde was lying on the bed, eyes closed.

“Hey, I came to return your manga.” He said as he walked over to the blonde’s suitcase where he dropped the item inside the open flap. He turned to find his band mate lying on the covers stripped down to his short blue and white boxer-briefs. Aoi moved closer and looked at how thin his sleeping companion really was. Through the baggy clothes, a person would think he had thicker thighs, but in reality, they’re about as thin as their vocalist’s own thighs. His hips bones stuck out and his ribs showed whenever he took a deep breath. The blonde was just laying there, sprawled out with one of his arms next to his head.

            Aoi swallowed hard as he sat quietly on the bed and looked at Reita’s exposed neck. He leaned over, getting closer to his band mates body and took a deep breath, taking in the bassist’s scent. His raw sweaty smell would usually make Aoi splash soapy water on him, but for some reason tonight that smell didn’t bother him. It actually aroused him a bit. He stopped for a moment, to think that maybe it was the fever or the adrenaline he was still going through. His mind then went blank as he let his instincts take over. He pressed his lips down the younger’s neck and made a trail of feather soft kisses up to the blonde’s lips. He gently turned Reita’s head up, gripped his chin, and kissed the chapped lips. He moved the slacked jaw a bit, opening the bassist’s mouth just enough that he took advantage of it. He moved his hand down between Reita’s legs, earning a soft moan.

            The raven’s eyes shot open as he yanked his whole body away and jumped off the bed. He waited in silence for a couple of minutes, but realized the blonde was still sleeping. He groaned slapped himself in the face. Reita snorted before opening his eyes and waking up. He felt off and looked over to see Aoi standing over him.

“Holy shit!” He yelped and sat up, making the guitarist jump. “What are you doing in here?”

“Re-returning you manga. You told me to before we went to bed tonight.”

The blonde scratched his head and looked down. That’s when he realized he had stripped down. His face turned blood red as he gripped his pillow and brought it front of himself. “If that’s all then goodnight.”

Aoi raised his eyebrow at the motion and was about to leave, but decided to sit on the bed instead. “Are you ok?”

“Um, yeah why wouldn’t I be?”

“You’re hiding behind a pillow.”

The blonde blushed an even deeper shade of red as he tossed the object off the side of the bed, exposing himself again. “Damn it.” He sighed. He got on all fours and crawled to the other side of the bed. He reached down to get the pillow, spreading his legs and sticking his butt straight into the air as he grabbed the soft headrest. Aoi watched with amusement the whole time until he was watching the plumped cheeks wiggle in the air for a moment. He swallowed as he reached his arm out to grab one of them, but then Reita shot back up and he yanked his arm back.

            The blonde turned and crawled back into his spot to see the raven looking off to the side with clenched fists. “You okay?”

“Dandy.” He growled and suddenly stood up, facing away from the blonde. “I’m going to bed.”

Reita watched as he walked out of the room before he laid back down and closed his eyes. Outside his door, the guitarist was clenching his fists and glaring at the bulge in his pants. It twitched a bit and he groaned as he made his way back to his own room. 

~~~Two weeks later~~~

Reita slipped on his jacket and rubbed his hand against the mahogany wood of his most precious item. He stared at the photos that adorned the top of it and on in particular made his heart flutter. The one where he and his crush were sitting next to each other laughing. He smiled slightly before slipping on his shoes and grabbing his should bag before heading out. He was in a pleasant mood that day as he walked down to the garage. He looked at his motorcycle and at his mustang trying to decide which one he wanted to drive that day. He stuffed his bag into the saddle bag of his bike and he pulled his helmet off the back rest. He placed it on his head and got on his motorcycle to head out.

            He pulled up to the company about forty five minutes later and made his way up to the studio. He opened the door only to have a drumstick hit his head.

“Ow! What was that for?” He asked. He looked forward to his leader glaring at him from behind the drums along with four other sets of eyes. “W-what?”

“You’re late!” Kai growled. “You haven’t been picking up your phone either.”

Reita smiled and scratched the back of his head as he set his helmet on the coffee table. “Sorry, I rode my bike today and there was a traffic jam on the way here. I kind of got caught in it.”

The drummer pinched the bridge of his nose and sighed. “Let’s just continue, please hurry and get ready.”

The blonde smiled as he tossed his helmet onto the couch and walked over to the equipment to pull out his bass that he left behind the last time. He moved to his spot in the room and for further instruction on his leader’s part. They started playing without telling him what song they were starting with, but he quickly figured it out and joined in. He smiled slightly as a bead of sweat went down his face. ‘They’re going to give me hell the rest of the day.’

            After a couple of hours of practicing and adjustments, they sat down to have some lunch, which was some sushi that had been delivered earlier. They grabbed their plates that were sitting to the side as Kai pulled the plastic lid off the round container. Their mouths watered at the colorful layers of fish and rice. Reita went to grab a piece when the bandleader hit his hand with chopsticks.

“You were almost an hour late, you get to go last.”

The blond sighed, but pulled back as he watched the other pile their plates. He waited with puppy eyes as everyone sat back started eating before he went through the last pickings of the plate. All the shrimp were gone making his eyes water a bit in sadness. He looked over at who was sitting next to him, having two pieces on his plate. He nudged the guitarist’s side.

“Hey, can I have one of your shrimp?” He put on his best smile.

Aoi glared at him. “No.”

He rubbed his head on the elder’s shoulder and batted his eyes as he placed his hand on the guitarist’s leg. “Please?”

Aoi’s cheeks lit up a bit, but it may not have been from embarrassment as much as anger. “Get off.”  The raven pushed Reita a little too hard and the bassist fell into Ruki, knocking his plate out of his hand. The plate hit the floor sending the sushi flying into the air and landing next to it.

“Sorry, Ru.” The blonde giggled, earning a growl and glare from the singer. He swallowed hard before offered his plate over which was yanked out of his hand. “What a waste.”

“Why don’t you eat it off the floor then?” Aoi grumbled. Reita felt a pain through his chest and he jumped to his feet.

“What is your problem?” He finally yelled. He had been holding back because he obviously upset everyone by being late today, but this was going overboard. “What the hell did I do to you to piss you off?”

Aoi closed his eyes as he stuffed his mouth with another piece sushi. The other members looked between them as the silence and tension grew. Reita loosened his fists and turned to drop back on the couch. “What did I even do? You guys are acting like you’ve never been late before.”

“We’re just stressed out Rei.” Kai mumbled. “They planning on putting us on a fan tour in a couple of weeks and we’re just not ready yet. I mean we haven’t even gotten a break from the last tour.”

“Yeah I know.” The blonde sighed as he leaned back. “But still, Aoi doesn’t have to treat me like a dog.”

“Reita’s right,” Uruha spoke up. “Aoi you need chill out and back off a bit. I don’t know what has you on edge here lately, but you need to calm down a bit.”

“Please do apologize so we can go back to better terms.” The leader smiled his puppy dog smile.

Reita looked at the older male as he wiped his mouth and turned in the blonde direction. “I’m sorry…I’m sorry you’re a pathetic little shit.”

The blonde growled as he gripped Aoi’s shirt and stood up, bring the guitarist with him. “What the hell man? Like seriously what is your problem?”

The raven gripped the blonde’s thin wrist and pulled it away. “You are. You just do whatever the hell you want like nothing is ever your problem. You just go around thinking that nothing is your fault.”

“What the hell are you talking about?” Reita yelled.

“You’re useless. To me, to the band, to everyone. We don’t need you! Ever!”

Reita gasped as he loosened his grip and stepped back. He felt the tears filling his eyes. “Asshole.” He whispered before he turned and stormed out of the room. Aoi closed his eyes, but was punched in the face which knocked him to the ground. He looked up at Ruki, who was glaring down at him with an angered face.

“You had no right to say that!” He yelled. “How dare you say it? How dare you say something like that to your friend?”

He looked away only to find Uruha glaring at him before running out the door.

            The guitarist made his way down the hall and caught up to his friend. He gripped the blonde’s shoulder, but was shrugged off as they kept walking. “Rei, don’t listen to him. He’s completely wrong.”

“I know.” He murmured.

“Then why are you so upset about it?”

“Because… _he_ said it. That’s how _he_ views me.”

Uruha scratched his head. “Listen Rei-”

“I’m going home. I’ll see you tomorrow.” The blonde continued walking not wanting to finish the conversation. He headed down to the first level of the parking lot where he found his motorcycle and mounted it. He reached back to grab his helmet only to remember he left up in the studio. He groaned in frustration, but started the bike nonetheless. He didn’t want to go back up and face his band mates. Not when he was on the brink of crying. He hit his kickstand and revved the engine before peeling out of the spot to the opening of the garage.

            Aoi stared up at the ceiling as he heard Kai walking around the room. He ignored his pounding cheek as he thought about he had said to his band mate. He closed his eyes and rubbed them as someone’s feet stopped next to his body.  Before he could open his eyes, the person had yanked him by the shirt and into the air. Uruha was glaring at him.

“What the hell is wrong with you?” He gasped. “How could say those things to him?”

Aoi looked away. “I fucked up okay. Sorry. I’ll go apologize to him.”

“No. You’re not just going to apologize for today. You’ve been acting really weird since the tour ended. Blowing him off, giving him an attitude, yelling at him and calling him out on shit. Last week you called him a dumb fuck for messing up on one of his solos. Two days ago you questioned his music abilities and even said he doesn’t do anything. That he’s a lazy bum and lets us make his music. Aoi you know none of that is true.”

The raven looked away. “I know.”

“Then why are you doing it? Why are you saying those things and hurting him that way? What is wrong with you here lately, Aoi?”

He kept his eyes on the floor and clenched his fists. “I’ve just been so angry.”

“So you’ve been taking it out on him?”

“It’s his fault!”

            Reita drove down the main highway swerving in between cars. Not the safest thing to be doing with the heavy traffic that day, but he was still upset. Ever since Aoi came to his hotel room two weeks ago, the guitarist had been treating him differently and it hurt him. They were such good friends and he always made sure to put Aoi first. So why was his band mate being so hateful to him. Reita wiped the tears off his cheeks with his sleeve before passing the next car.

‘Did he find out?’ He thought. ‘But how would he? I’ve always kept my feelings in check. I never went beyond boundaries and I taught myself control when we’re together. So how or when would he have—’

His eyes widen when he saw the upcoming light turn from yellow to red. He squeezed his brakes as hard as he could and he skid down the road. His tires made a squeak as he made a complete stop just at the line. He took a deep breath before his ears were filled by the sound of screeching tires and crunching metal behind him. He managed a glance in the mirror to see the side of a car sliding towards him before his body was launched forward off his bike. He flew face first into oncoming traffic and his body flipped. He landed directly on his right shoulder before slamming his head onto the pavement. His body rolled twice before coming to a full stop. He could cars slamming on their brakes and honking their horns as his blurry vision turned black.

            “How?” Uruha yelled back at the studio as he still held a vice grip on his band mate’s shirt. “How in the hell is it his fault? What did he possibly do to you to make you act this way?”

Aoi bit his lip as he kissed his teeth. “He…” The guitarist’s face turned bright red.

Kai raised his eyebrow and finally stepped forward. He gently pulled Uruha’s hand away so the raven could stand properly. He grabbed the taller one’s chin and turned it to face him. “What happened that night Aoi? The night you took Rei his book back is when this all started. Did…something happen then? I can’t think of any other time you two were alone together.”

He sighed. “Yeah…that’s when it happened.”

“What did he do?” Ruki asked. The vocalist had been sitting back waiting for answers and he wasn’t leaving until they got some. Aoi moved past his leader and sat on the couch were he lit himself a cigarette.

“I…saw a part of Rei that… I was never meant to see.”

“What is that supposed to mean?” Uruha snapped but earned a stern look from Ruki to shut up.

“I can’t talk about it. Not with you guys.”

“None of us are leaving without getting answers. So you better grow some balls and man up.” The singer shouted. “This isn’t just an issue between you guys anymore. It’s escalated too far.”

“I haven’t been sleeping well.”

“That’s not what we asked. What happened that night?” Uruha raised his voice.

“If you’d shut up and listen, then I’ll tell you.”

“Okay, everyone calm down.” Kai said softly. “Now, let’s hear him out.”

“I haven’t been sleeping well. I’ve been having these dreams and there all about what happened that night. They have…escalated a bit.” He mumbled with a flushed face. “That night when I went into his room, he was laying only in his boxers. I…I don’t know what I was thinking… he was asleep and defenseless and I took …advantage of him.”

“What…do you mean you took advantage of him?” Uruha yelled, his eyes seemed like they would catch on fire. “What did you do to him? Did…did you rape him you son of a bitch!”

“I-I just kissed him!” Aoi stood to his feet with a red face from not only embarrassment, but from anger too. “Don’t you dare accuse me of raping him? How sick are you? He’s another man for heaven’s sake.”

“Then why did you kiss him?”Kai snickered, he knew he shouldn’t have been amused but it was sort of funny to him.

“I…he…was just laying there…I…I don’t know! I don’t know. He woke up soon after and we talked and he bent over and I was staring and I…I got hard. My friend gave me a hard on and now I’m having dreams about screwing him. Every time I see him I either see what he looked like that night or in one of my dreams and I just want it to stop! I want to stop thinking about him that way. When I made him cry last week…I almost lost it and now I’m seeing that face too and I can’t sleep without having those dreams. I just want them to stop. I just want it all to end!”

The other three stared at his with slacked jaws and wide eyes. Their door slammed open and Takeru ran inside. “You guys!” He grabbed the remote off the table and turned the tv hanging on the wall. A drama was currently playing, but the younger singer quickly changed the channel to the news. Standing on the side of the road next a pile of car was a newswoman.

“No one is sure who was at fault, but police have stated that it was due to multiple cars going over the speed limit. Again, if you are just tuning in, a pile up on the main highway has killed nine people and injured fourteen. Reports say that the cars were all hitting their breaks to stop and lost control of their vehicles. Other reports are stating that a van sideswiped a smaller car causing a chain reaction.   Among the injured was Reita, bassist of the GazettE.” Their eyes widen as Ruki jumped to his feet. “Reports say he was stopped at the light when a car from the crash collided with his motorcycle and sent him flying into the intersection. He and all the injured have been sent to the hospital. The highway will be blocked –”

Takeru had turned the tv off and stared at the frozen members. Aoi had tears running down his cheeks as he fell onto his knees and Uruha sat on the coffee table so he wouldn’t fall. The younger singer looked at them. “Guys…”

            The first thing that came to Reita’s mind when he opened his eyes was that it was really bright. He blinked a few times to make out the white walls of the room, then the lights, and the people. In the corner was Kai sitting in the chair staring at the floor with Uruha standing against the wall next to him. He grunted as he moved his hand up and rubbed his forehead. Kai’s and Uruha’s head shot up at the same time when they heard the noise.

“Rei.” The blonde turned to see Ruki sitting in the chair next to him.

He blinked a few times and looked around for the missing member only to find him not there. He closed his eyes and tried to lift his other arm only to find it heavy. He looked down to see it in a sling and he looked over at his band mates. “What happened?”

“A car hit you and you were flung off your bike. You dislocated your shoulder and fractured your skull.”

“Oh yeah. I kind of remember.” He smiled, but it faded. “Is Aoi still mad at me?”

They looked between each other and looked at him and Uruha spoke. “I think he’s mad at himself.”

“Where is he?” He whispered.

“He went down to get us all coffee.” Ruki said with a smile. “He should be back any minute.”

Reita let out a deep breathe. “I really fucked up this time didn’t I? What did our manager say?”

“You didn’t fuck up Rei, you were just in accident. It could have happened to any of us.” Kai sighed. “We paused all band activities until you’re healed.”

“Is…is Aoi going to yell at me again?”

“No.” They all turned to see the guitarist standing in the doorway holding a tray of cups. He walked in and sat the coffee down on the table. “Could you guys leave us alone for a bit? I need to talk to him in private.”

They all looked at each other nervously before slowly getting up. They stepped outside the room and shut the door behind them. Aoi took a few deep breathes before looking at Reita. The blonde was looking down and fidgeting with his blanket. Aoi stepped over and sat down on the bed making his friend flinch. He took a chance and gently sat his hand on Reita’s own, making him stop moving. The bassist looked up to find Aoi looking at the floor with flushed cheeks.

“Reita,” Aoi whispered, but then spoke louder. “I am so, so sorry. This is all my fault.”

“No, it’s not.” Reita whimpered but Aoi glared at him.

“Akira,” His voice was deep and it made the blonde’s body shiver. “If I hadn’t been so damn awful to you these past few weeks, none of this would have happened. If I hadn’t had these dreams and thoughts about you I wouldn’t be so angry. I wanted to blame you for it, but it’s not your fault. It’s mine. It’s my fault imagining you the way I do. For wanting you the way I do.”

“Aoi…” Reita gasped. “Wh-what are you saying?”

The guitarist gave a sad smile as he leaned over and gently pressed his lips against Reita’s. The blonde froze in shock. Aoi pulled away and started to get up to run away, but Reita quickly grabbed his arm.

“What the hell?” He shouted. “You can’t just treat me like shit for weeks, then come in here saying all these things to me, kiss me and then leave! Aoi, you’re such an asshole.”

Aoi turned to see the tear running down his friend’s face. He felt a pain in his chest. He sat back down and rubbed Reita’s cheeks to wipe the tears away. “I think… I think I’m in love with you Akira. I’m sorry. I acted the way I did because I thought it was your fault for making me fall for you.”

“Yuu.” Reita whimpered. His body shook as he leaned closer and kissed the raven haired man. “I’ve been in love with you for a couple of years now. I couldn’t say anything because I didn’t want you to reject me. But here you are confessing to me.”

Aoi pulled Reita into a gentle hug. “I want to be with you Reita. But I can’t.”

“Why?”

“I treated you so badly. There’s no way I can make it up to you.”

Reita rubbed his head into the guitarist shoulder. “If you work at it, I’ll forgive you. Please don’t be selfish and take this from me. Please don’t do this to me. Don’t say you love me then leave me.”

Aoi closed his eyes. “Okay. I’ll stay.”

            Ruki was outside the room pacing back and forth biting his thumb nail. Uruha was reading from a magazine as Kai continued to make a beat with his feet and hands. They had been sitting out there for almost an hour waiting to be called back into the room. Ruki was about to go insane from having to wait so long on their friends to make up.

“Please to stop pacing, you’re driving me mad.” Uruha said dropping the magazine.

“Well sorry for worrying about my friends. What if they’re in there killing each other or fighting again?”

“I think we would hear it then.”

“They could be making out or maybe even doing it.” Kai said with a smirk.

“Stop it!” They shouted at their drummer.

He shrugged and stood up. “Let’s check in on them then.”

He moved to the door and opened it a crack to peek inside. The other two leaned to in to see inside as well. The scene made them relax. Aoi was holding Reita as they slept soundly on the hospital bed. Kai carefully closed the door and looked at his bandmates.

“We’ll I guess this is a start.” Uruha said. “At least they won’t be fighting anymore.”

Kai nodded. “I think everything will turn out just fine. They just need time to work everything out properly.”

“Let’s leave them be then. We can come back tomorrow.” Ruki said and started walking away. His two friends agreed and followed him. The two lovebirds slept peacefully that night for the first time in a long time.


End file.
